


Professional Hunters

by cloakoflevitation



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, How Do I Tag, No Beta – idk how to write Antfrost I'm sorry, badass BadBoyHalo (DreamSMP), eggpire arc, honestly there isn't anything to tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-14 18:34:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29671500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloakoflevitation/pseuds/cloakoflevitation
Summary: Fic version of the scene where Tommy meets the egg with BadBoyHalo and Antfrost. I heard Bad say the line, "Tommy, you know Ant and I are professional hunters," and lost my goddamn mind (as I should).This was literally an excuse to write badass!BBH and badass!Antfrost. That's it. It's just the canon in fic form and slightly more dramatic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Comments: 6
Kudos: 34





	Professional Hunters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bugboydead](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bugboydead/gifts).



> @bugboydead, I have no idea if this is the kind of fic you would like, but you left me a nice comment on my last fic (my first dream smp one) and I appreciated that, so I wanted to gift this to you <3

“I just, uh, I feel a little unsafe, you know?”

“That’s ridiculous.” Bad dismissed the idea with an easy smile. “Everyone is safe with the egg.”

Despite the reassurance, a sense of uneasiness settled itself in the pit of Tommy’s stomach. “Right…” He glanced sideways at Antfrost from the corner of his eyes. “So you haven’t noticed any changes…?”

**“ﬧׅ〒ŀ ŀㅓㅓ ∴ŀ|:ᓵフᒲŀነ ॥フ⚍ ﬧׅフᒲᒲ॥”**

Startled, Tommy edged away from Antfrost and the sounds that had just come out of his mouth. He was sure Antfrost hadn’t spoken… _whatever_ that was before the whole egg infatuation, but when he looked over to Bad for a reaction, Bad didn’t seem bothered at all by the alien language.

“Tommy?”

“Oh, ah, nevermind, nevermind.” He took another step further away, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, and stared intently at the egg so he didn’t have to look at either of them. “Just thinking aloud to myself, don’t worry.” His fingers ran along the bottom edge of his shirt for lack of anything better to do.

“Hey, why don’t you touch the egg?”

The question sounded so simple, so straightforward, and Bad’s voice was so genuine, it almost made Tommy forget the warnings he’d heard about touching the egg or the blood vines. “I, uh…” He looked up, and Bad and Antfrost were inching closer to him, both carrying their ever-present tridents. Despite the calm, carefully polite expressions on their faces, it felt a bit like he was being shadowed by armed guards. He swallowed uncomfortably and tried to think of a way to fend off Bad’s idea without upsetting him. “I would but… you see, Sam Nook told me I shouldn’t touch anything, and who am I to argue with Sam Nook, you know? He’s _Sam Nook.”_

Bad hummed. “Well, I think what he meant was that you shouldn’t touch it… with _shoes_ on.”

_Sure. Because that made sense._

“…You think so?”

“Mhm.” Bad nodded earnestly, no trace of mockery in his expression.

Standing where he was, Antfrost and Bad had loosely cornered him so that he was stuck between them and the egg. Reluctantly, not seeing a better option, he pulled off his shoes and, after a moment, the rest of his armor. He set it on the ground next to him in a little pile, ignoring darker memories of throwing everything down into a hole in the ground and waiting for the deafening explosion that always followed.

“Touch it,” Antfrost prompted him, shifting his weight slightly, a little too eager for Tommy’s liking. “Touch the egg.”

He hesitated. “Do you really think I should?”

“Mhm, go on,” Bad encouraged him, followed immediately by Antfrost nodding and agreeing, “Yeah, go on.”

And the thing was, _the thing was,_ they didn’t sound corrupted or evil or anything like Sam or the others had warned him about. They didn’t sound _enslaved_ to the egg. Yeah, sure, Antfrost’s eyes were a different color, and maybe both Bad and Antfrost seemed a little too insistent that everyone should get to know the egg… but it didn’t seem _bad._ It didn’t seem _evil._ It felt like they had found a new curious thing in the very strange world they all lived in, and they wanted to share it with everyone else. It felt like all of the other weird oddities that Tommy normally associated with Bad and his particular circle of friends.

It was hard to conceive of Bad acting maliciously, knowingly putting other people in danger, getting involved in anything nefarious. It was _Bad_ – the guy who used ‘muffin’ as a swear and didn’t know about standing on crafting tables and somehow loved his horrible little dog. He was quirky – a real character to be sure – but Tommy truly couldn’t see Bad orchestrating some mastermind plan or even merely getting swept up with something as world-ending as everyone made the egg out to be.

So maybe that’s why he gave in, ignoring the previous warnings of his friends, and reached out and touched the egg.

He hadn’t expected anything as dramatic as fire to rain down from the heavens or a choir of heavenly beings to start singing, but he had expected a little more than _nothing._

“How do you feel?”

Tommy moved to touch a different part of the egg, all the while watching the red surface beneath his hand as if it would open up a gaping maw lined with teeth and reach out and drag him into it at any moment. Taking in a deep breath, he tried to focus on the egg, on what he felt, on feeling anything at all… and there was still nothing.

“Tommy,” Antfrost repeated, this time a bit more insistently, “How do you feel?”

“Uh…”

“You don’t feel anything?” Bad’s eyes narrowed, and he tapped his fingers on the top of his helmet where it was tucked under his arm. His shoulders were pushed back, spine straight, fully dressed in armor, minus his helmet. Unexpectedly, it struck Tommy how much he looked like a soldier.

“Wh– I don– y– what do _you_ feel?” Tommy stepped closer towards the wall, gesturing for Bad to step up to the egg. “Come over here. You touch it. What do you feel?”

Bad stepped forward and placed his hand flat against the egg. The reaction was immediate; the tiniest hint of a smile pulled at the corners of his mouth, and his shoulders seemed to relax ever so slightly.

Tommy demanded again, “What do you feel?”

“It’s the egg,” Bad said simply, blinking at Tommy as though it should be obvious, whatever it was that they were both supposed to be feeling. Then, as if realizing something, Bad tilted his head and asked curiously, “Do you hear anything?”

The word _no_ started to form on his lips, but, catching sight of the calculation in Bad’s eyes, he let the word remain unsaid. He paused, feigning like he was listening to something, before letting his eyes slowly widen. “I do! I do hear it!”

A smile blossomed on Bad’s face. “You hear it?”

“I do! It’s saying… uh, that we should swear! Yeah, the egg is demanding swears!” He turned and pulled an exaggeratedly affronted face in the general direction of the egg and stage whispered, “Geez, you can’t say that out in public, egg, are you crazy? Think of the children, egg!”

The smile slid off of Bad’s face. 

Antfrost hissed, **“፧フ╎リ ⚍ነ フ። ʖŀ ᓵフリነ⚍ᒲŀ↸”**

“Ant,” Bad said, a hint of something layered just beneath the surface of his voice, “Could I speak to you for a moment?” As they walked further into the center of the cavern, Bad flashed a grin over his shoulder at Tommy. “You stay there, we’ll just be a moment.”

“Sure,” Tommy murmured, more to himself than to either of them. “I’ll just be here. With the egg. It’s fine.”

He couldn’t hear what they were saying, but he saw them glance over towards him twice during their conversation. Antfrost no longer seemed concerned with keeping up any pretense of pleasantness or civility. The palms of Tommy’s hands started to sweat, and he pulled his armor back on, fumbling nervously with the buckles.

“Tommy,” Bad called to him as he and Antfrost made their way back over. “Are you _sure_ you don’t feel anything?”

It felt like he was being given a final chance to answer the question, and it was painfully clear that there was a right answer. “No,” he hurried to say, “I feel so much! So much! I mean, the things that I’m feeling, because of the egg, they are – I mean so much feeling is happening! The egg – it just… you know? I mean… you know?”

The two exchanged a pointed look. Antfrost said calmly, “I think the egg wishes to consume him.”

A cough of awkward laughter tore its way out of his throat. “What…?” He tried to find the hidden smiles, the mischievous teasing in their eyes but was only faced with stoicism. “You’re not – surely you’re not serious?”

“Be quiet for a second.” Bad took a few steps closer towards the egg, which sent Tommy scrambling further away, careful to stay out of arm’s reach of both Bad and Antfrost. Bad placed a hand on the egg and closed his eyes. He muttered, “I need to listen to the egg.”

For a tense moment, the only sound in the cavern was the boiling of the lava pockets scattered amongst the blood vines and the groans of a zombie somewhere in the distance. Tommy stuck his hand into his pocket and fished around, fingers curling around an ender pearl. He didn’t pull it out of his pocket, but he clutched onto it, waiting, steeling himself to run if he needed to.

Then Bad stepped back, nodding to himself with a determined set to his mouth. He straightened his shoulders and pulled his helmet on, and Tommy was struck by his eyes. They were _solid white._

“…Bad?” When there was no response, he turned desperately to Antfrost. “…Antfrost?”

Antfrost grinned, showing fangs.

Bad pulled out an axe. “I don’t think the egg likes you, Tommy.”

As they started to run towards him, Tommy turned towards the far left corner of the cavern, yanking the ender pearl out of his pocket and throwing it as far as he could. The world pulled and snapped, and then he was standing at the base of the staircase out, hearing haunting calls of, “Tommy… Tommy…” coming from behind him.

He threw himself up the stairs, tripping and falling more than once, but never stopping for a second. There was no doubt in his mind that something was wrong, far beyond wrong. He had no illusions about his safety around the egg anymore nor around Antfrost and Bad.

“Aw Tommy,” Bad called behind him, raising his voice, but not yelling, not angry, not harsh. Maybe it was the way the cavern made him echo or maybe it was just the way he seemed to speak, but Bad didn’t _sound_ like he was trying to hunt Tommy down. He sounded hurt that Tommy would run and gently teasing that Tommy would think he needed to run in the first place. If Tommy didn’t know better, if he hadn’t just had to ender pearl away, if he wasn’t _sure_ something horrible was happening, he would think Bad was only playing. “Come back, Tommy. You don’t need to go.”

“No, no, I’m alright, I’m okay, I’m–” As he made it to the surface, he saw it was raining and nearly cried in relief. Pulling out his trident, he launched himself into the air, desperately trying to think of where he could go, where he would be safe from them. “That was enough chatting for me, I’ll be going now gentlemen.”

He heard laughter that sent a chill down his spine. _Antfrost._

But outside, away from the cavern, he was sure he could outrun them. The ender pearl had given him a head start, and as long as he used his trident and got out of sight soon, they shouldn’t be able to follow him. He ran past the church, past Ponk’s tower, waiting for them to jump out from behind every building, every hill, every tree that he passed. He looked back over his shoulder every few seconds, paranoid that he would see them between one blink and the next, but they were never there.

Only when he finally made it back to the hotel build site did he feel safe, despite knowing how feeble the wooden fences around the property would be at keeping anyone out. But he was away, far away, and he hadn’t seen them the whole time, so he should be safe. All the same, he stood on the platform in front of the hotel foundations, staring out towards the direction of the cavern that held the egg, looking for any signs of movement.

Sam Nook was standing further down the platform, overseeing the build site, and absently, Tommy reached up to make sure he had his hard hat on. He was safe with Sam Nook.

A sheep in the distance wandered around two trees, and fear spiked in him for a fleeting moment as he briefly mistook it for Antfrost. But the longer he watched, the more reassured he grew that he had managed to leave them behind in that horrid cavern. The tension fell away from his shoulders slightly, and he looked above the horizon, searching for the sun.

“Oh Tommy…”

His heart rate jumped, enough to kill him had he been any older, and he nearly slipped off the edge of the platform as he jumped back, spinning around to face Bad and Antfrost, who had inexplicably appeared seemingly from nowhere at all. _“Wha–?!”_

Antfrost set his trident down in front of himself, his hands on the shaft, and used it as an anchor to lean forward, closer to Tommy, a wild ferality in his eyes that sent a shiver down Tommy’s spine.

“Fellas… haha…” His voice sounded too high and panicky even to his own ears.

Bad tilted his head, his grin sharp enough to cut diamond. “Tommy,” he said slowly, stuck somewhere between an apology and a taunt, “You know Ant and I are professional hunters.” He slowly rolled his wrist, twirling his axe through the air in a way that looked more natural than flashy.

Standing in front of them, unarmed, outnumbered, and terrified from the statement about their _professional_ activities, Tommy did the smartest thing, and quite frankly, the only thing that he could possibly do to save himself. Taking a deep breath, he yelled, “HARD HATS!” as loud as he possibly could and dove past Antfrost, running down the platform until Sam Nook stood between him and the others. “They’re not wearing their hard hats, Sam!”

Bad and Antfrost exchanged a look, having a moment of silent communication in the span of a heartbeat that ended with Antfrost looking pointedly at the sword and trident that Sam Nook was holding.

Sam Nook stood completely still and took in the sight of both of them impassively. “YOU WILL NEED A HARD HAT IN THE BUILD SITE . . . OTHERWISE YOU MUST LEAVE . . . ”

“Yeah!” Tommy’s lungs seemed incapable of breathing properly anymore. “You don’t have hard hats! You have to leave!”

Antfrost’s eyes narrowed nearly to slits, and Tommy was struck by how close this all had come to ending in a _very_ different manner.

“PLEASE EXIT THE BUILD SITE . . . ”

For a moment, no one moved. Antfrost seemed to be having a staring contest with Sam, and just as Tommy was worried it would all devolve into a full-on fight, Sam spoke again.

“IF YOU DO NOT EXIT THE BUILD SITE . . . THEN FORCE WILL BE USED . . . ”

Tommy edged around Sam Nook, using him as a shield as Bad and Antfrost walked around the other side, out through the gates of the build site, back onto the prime path. His hand involuntarily rose to press against his chest, feeling his own shallow breaths.

_Oh god._

Bad started to walk away, but Antfrost stood still, watching him. Tommy felt a bit like a bug under a microscope. Finally, all Antfrost said was, **“॥フ⚍። ⎓ᔑﬧׅŀ ╎ነ ነŀᔑ|:ŀ↸”**

The alien language was unsettling to hear, and Tommy was starting to worry maybe some kind of curse was being cast upon him. He truly had no idea what Antfrost was saying, and he had a sinking feeling that it might have been important somehow.

Bad stopped when Antfrost spoke, his gaze flicking to Antfrost for a split second before he met Tommy’s nervous gaze and gave a little wave. Had it been before today, before the egg encounter, Tommy might have made fun of him and maybe waved back, but now the gesture only made him feel sick. “Bye for now, Tommy,” Bad crooned. 

There was a fair amount of distance between him and the other two, not to mention the fence and a whole Sam Nook, but it didn’t feel like nearly enough. 

A vicious smile tugged at one side of Bad’s mouth. “You’ll get to know the egg soon enough, don’t you worry.”

**Author's Note:**

> Bad gives me very owo and pastel kinda vibes, so when he delivered that line about being a professional hunter and him and Antfrost popped up lowkey out of thin air... idk how to explain it but I just;;;; I liked that. everyone liked that.


End file.
